Dear Internet: About Perez Hilton.

Earlier this week the internet went crazy over Perez Hilton posting a picture of him and his 2 year old son in the shower on Instagram. You couldn’t see anything “private”, it was just a sweet picture of a dad parenting. Instead of seeing a pretty awesome moment of a dad just being a dad and having fun the internet screamed child abuse.   Moms post pictures of themselves bathing with their littles all the time, and no one bats an eye. Why is this father under so much fire? Actually, we all know the answer to that, right?  CaptureAnd there it is. The internet is afraid that somehow showering with his dad was going to make him gay (because we all know that being gay is something others “make” you do, it has nothing to do with who you are or anything. PS that was said in sarcasm font, which the internet has yet to make yet. Why is that?)  Even if showering with his father COULD make him gay (I’m still laughing, by the way) is that really terrible? Thankfully, just as I started to give up hope on humanity, there were people jumping in to the comments to support him.

These pictures tell a story to me, not a story of abuse, just a story of a dad who loves his kids. One who has happy kids and who is trying to do the best he can.  Can we just stop being jerks about it simply because he happens to also be a gay father?

Wear All The babies, Buy All The Carriers

About a month ago I ordered a new baby carrier. I seem to have a little obsession with them, but really I was just trying to find what would work.

 

*please note this entry contains some amazon affiliate links* 

I initially had an Ergo Baby Carrier. Ergo baby carriers use to be what the Tulas are now back when I had Lady Girl. Of course they were expensive then and I made do with our cuddly wrap, but I longed to have a soft structured carrier (SSC) so when I was pregnant with Little Miss I bought a wrap for the earlier years and an ergo for later.She hated the wrap, but loved the ergo. The ergo, however, was not a friend to me.I’m tall. I’m fluffy-ish (I have had five kids, I’ve given up hope that I’ll ever go back to having no fluff) and I found the ergo dug at me. Hubby loved it.

#babywearing #babywearingdaddy #teamDDW #daddydoinwork

A post shared by Vanessa H (@mzvanessah) on

 

We went on to find a Lillebaby, which was ok, I loved that the lillebaby offered various safe positions and the lumbar support, but the panel was short on it (I also found it a bit short on the ergo too) 

 

Check out Lillebaby Carriers on Amazon

 

Then I discovered the Tula world.

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International Day Of The Midwife

 
 Today is International Midwife Day. A day to celebrate all that midwives do.  Personally I think we should have a midwife MONTH. One day is too short to recognize all that midwives do.
 
 
I’m thankful for my care at WCM with three of my five pregnancies.
I felt completely empowered by my midwife births in a way that you really can’t describe, for that I will always be thankful for having my midwives. They kept me informed, they were always available to answer my (thousand) questions or just listen to my concerns (no matter how crazy  ) and be a calming voice.  Midwives saw me through an induction, breastfeeding issues and a pregnancy that kept me on my toes & ended with quick birth. They were there for me when I needed and reassured me when I was anything but sure.
My midwives helped to make pregnancy and birth a beautiful experience, even when it doesn’t go as expected or when babies come a moment too fast   They will always be a special part of our babies stories.
 
 
 

“In this country of billboards covered in tits, I think we should try to get used to this”

This video has been all over my facebook and twitter. When I first saw it I had tears.


It captured so much of what I felt as a new mother, nursing my child. Feeling like I should hide, run, cover up. Then, like most mothers, I reached a point where I stopped hiding. Stopped worrying about what everyone else may have though about my simply feeding my hungry infant.

“At first I thought it was ok
I could understand their reasons
They said ‘There might be young children, or a nervous man seeing’
this small piece of flesh that they weren’t quite expecting
so I whispered and tiptoed with nervous discretion.

But after six months of her life sat sitting on lids
as she sips on her milk nostrils sniffing up piss
Trying not to bang her head on toilet roll dispensers
I wonder whether these public loo feeds offend her?
Cos I’m getting tired of discretion and being ‘polite’ as my baby’s first sips are drowned drenched in shite,”

This spoken word poem by Hollie McNish is so powerful and captured so much of what I think most mothers feel.
At first, worried about everyone else, and about being discreet. Then comes the realization that you’re hiding, cowering away while breasts are being used to sell food, movies, alcohol, clothes, body spray (etc), followed by the anger. Why are mothers being made to feel ashamed for feeding their young the way nature had always intended? Being made to feel as if they are doing something wrong for that one simple act. No one should be made to feel like that.

This isn’t about the mom war, or about breastfeeders being ‘better’ than formulafeeders.
It’s about a mother’s right to feed her child without feeling shamed by doing so.

 

“In this country of billboards covered in tits, I think we should try to get used to this”

VanessSig

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