I am always amazed how something like a song can bring a rush of memories back.
The other day I hit ‘flow’ on my deezer account and let the music fill the air.
No Doubt came on. They were big in the late 90s right around the time that I was discovering boys and dating and, inevitably, getting my heart broken for the first time. I hadn’t thought about that time, or boy, in a long time, but when that song came on it all came rushing back.
The relationship had started out as friends. Us playing video games after school and just hanging out. We were comfortable together. He made me laugh. He wasn’t like other boys I knew. He liked me the way I was and I felt comfortable being myself around him.
I’m not sure when it changed to something more, but it did, and it was pretty great until it wasn’t.
As an adult I know that it was just a teenage puppy love, but as a teenage girl I was heartbroken.
This song was my anthem, my heartbreak song. It spoke to me in ways nothing else did.
Hearing the song brought back all the memories. The laughter. The fun times. The first time he held my hand. That first kiss. The last one. The nights I spent crying not just over a lost boy, but over the friendship that was now damaged beyond repair.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not longing for the past, in fact I’m happy for it. The broken road, the heartbreaks I went through, all of them lead me to where I am. To my husband, our children our life, and for that I’m extremely happy. God bless the broken road that lead me to this life.